Life, disconnected.

Life, disconnected.

I am back again writing up my sporadic rants when I am distracted at midnight and unable to perform basic mathematics.

What I wanted to ask was, when, if ever possible are we disconnected from the internet?

Egalitarian Opportunism - Rant #4

Welcome to planet Earth
Where people are divided
Some who try to fight it got violence and it hurts
Damaged turf, put men at work so people could manage personal demons and them it's worth

And now the world is crumbling and they want us on our knees. But we were born fighters. Baptisms by water, fire and blood. Yes, I know I start sentences with coordinating conjunctions. And what? That point is irrelevant. My point, really, is that I find it so funny that the Earth is so divided. Race comes to mind as a big one. Religion too. There's others. Age discrimination, sexuality etc. It's kinda saddening.

I really don't understand racism. I mean, I'm white (really I'm Lebanese, but close enough) and I love everybody. Literally, everybody. Even the people I hate. I think it comes down to the fact that overly sensitive people as well as racism itself perpetuate racism. And then there's the whole division over sexuality and equality arguments. Uh oh. This guy going to talk about homosexual issues? Controversial! Butt fuck it. I'm going in.

The Letter I Almost Wrote

I remember it like it just happened
I could've sworn it was a dream
But in reality it hit me like a nightmare
Or at least that's how it seemed

If you're reading this then I guess I've made up my mind. I sat here for a while thinking. Just thinking. About everything. You. Me. Everyone. It's what we do when things don't go the way they're supposed to, isn't it? We just think and mull it over and analyse and try to figure out what went wrong and why it happened that way and how we could've changed it or stopped it or played it out until we go round and round in circles chasing something that was never really there. And then we stop. Because we explode. I guess that's where I am now. I couldn't take it so I exploded. Ghost.

I guess you'll want to know why.

Seven Inverted Sevens

Wishes that the world could see
From the position of my girl and me
From the perspective of laying on the hood of a car
Looking up at the stars with all the connections cut

First iteration. One of the first inverted I ever met. You came in threes. And all three of you stayed with me. But you were the first. The sister that I never thought I'd have. The one that I found myself running to protect. The littlest big sister ever. If I ever have a biological sister (small chance now, methinks) but if ever, I hope she's like you. Just less pretty. It's too hard to chase away the boys. They're so damn persistent. I'm sure you know all about it. Years go by and it's like nothing happened. I love it. Sia. Don't stress too much, you little stresspot. Everything is going to be okay. Trust me.

Second inversion. Two of three. Popped off. I still see you at least a few times a week. Can't get away from you. It's gonna be so weird when uni ends and we go separate ways. Better still see you a lot. It's so hard to replace older brothers these days. It's hard to put into words, but brother pretty much sums it up. Now go find a girl before I do and you never can again. #FamilyIsNotJustABloodline.

Death of an Old Friend

I'm tryna go beyond love, and this is hard to translate
Love is good, but to me, good is just the enemy of great
You wanna make it to the top, but you don't got what it take
...
I used to love ya, I think to hold ya
You didn't know me, it was only just a mirage

Just the enemy of great. Just an enemy of the state. The state being the mind. It still fucks with me that it can fuck with me. My head is mine, not yours. You don't own me. What have you done for me lately? I don't see no rings on these fingers! So please just give me it back. I used to love you. Not anymore.

They told me I was talented. They told me I could go places. "You're smart," they said. "We've never seen anyone like you." You were inclined to agree. You made me believe them. They showed me how to be the person I was, how to take an uncut gem, mould it, polish it, complete it. Then you took it. And you spun it. Round and round and round my head. You showed me love. But you did me wrong.

Chapter One - Reserved Seating

You don't even know what you want from love anymore
I search for somethin' I'm missing and disappear when I'm bored
But girl, what qualities was I lookin' for before?
Who you settlin' for? Who better for you than the boy, huh?

The words reverberated through his head, bouncing around the inside of his mind. Bass coursed through the headphones, the rhythmic thump, thump, thump pleasing his senses. Sebastian sighed. Walking around with his headphones blaring was one of the only ways he could relax lately. For a kid, he sure had a lot on his mind. And there was about to be a whole lot more.

The bus rounded the corner unexpectedly, it's bright red chassis catching the light and Sebastian's attention. He was still two hundred metres from the bus stop. He couldn't be late. Not today. Not again.