Mindless Void?

So what's going on? Need a man to lend a helping hand? I'm just a lost little boy but I'll help you find the way. So talk to me, tell me what's on your mind. I'm not just some guy, I'm a damn brother man. No need to drop off. Just look in the mirror and keep on shining (yeah, I did just quote Rihanna, deal with it). Hit me up with your reality and I'll make it seem like a dream.

And now, back to reality, oh there goes gravity...And two trailer park girls go round the outsiiiiiiide. Weeeee. They say I dunno what I'm doing. Most of the time I don't. I just have a few things on my mind. Sahhhhhh purrrrrrty and perfect =P

So, two shifts at two different jobs. On the same day. NOT fun. It's horrendous. Start at 8:30AM for the first job, finish at 3PM. Head over for a bit of R&R a little close to home if you know what I'm saying. Head out at 4:10PM to get to work and start at 5PM. Finish at 8PM. Go for a visit and a free feed. Thanks bubby. I sorta needed it.

And maybe we'll think about tomorrow tonight. B-Boys, I met you at the bus stop. School ties, blue skies and the hilltops. I love it, I love it. Mind always going to mush. Sometimes I wish that it'd find a way to solidly form and stay like that. Just for a bit. I reckon it'd be nice.

I need to see my boys. ShadowLordz, I'm kinda missing you. Wish you'd replied to that text. School ties need to be reinstated. I ain't seen 'em in so long. Lucky we have that feed coming up. Jyamaigo, you're coming to mine on Wednesday, hang out at my place, come training with me, and then after we feed. Then you can crash at mine. Spare beds and all. I got this, bro. Chill.

Tennis is good. I guess. For a guy that doesn't watch that much of it. But yeah. Aussie Open. Woooo! Need to regain the fitness brahz. Dreambrah is dying in terms of physicality. Gaining weight for all the wrong reasons. Time to be a mean, whipped cream, fighting machine.

Living in a dreamed reality,

The Sleepless Dreamer

Yeah. I'm Losin' it.

Appreciate some help, but I don't think there's anyone out there who can help me out.
I don't wanna burden people close to me with what's in my head anyways.
I really have no idea what to do anymoar.
What happens when someone doesn't even have time to get back to you? Consistently?
Out of sight, out of mind sorta thing goin' on?
I'm no expert. But I'm sure as hell ain't an idiot.
Sometimes you just get stuck, and every exit that's possible is just jumping into a worse situation.
What do you do? If I'm my usual self. I make do with the IMpossible.
But right now? At the state of mind I'm in at this very moment?
Violence probably won't even help me feel better anymoar.
I'm numb.

Well, y'all party up hard and have a great time tomolo.
It's Australia Day after all. If you're celebrating with friends and family, be grateful.
Coz I ain't gettin' none of that ISH.


Take it easy,
Mr. Jyamaigo

Don't Get It.

There's still one thing that I just can't manage to understand.
It's either that or it's that I don't want to understand it.
How could something like that even happen at all?
Hope the thought ends here.


Take it easy,
Mr. Jyamaigo

P.S. Babe, I wanna watch a movie with you sometime. Do you have any time for me?

Hollow Man

Every. Single. Night. It's the same feeling.
I feel empty. I got nothing.
I'm giving everything. I'm given the bare minimum.
I use to just say I expected nothing.
Now I'm really falling into the state where I won't ever expect anything.

I guess this is the definition of being...
Lonely.


Take it easy,
Mr. Jyamaigo

Nevertheless...larva

First day of the new job. With the brother from a vastly different mother. I assure you. She is quite different. I think. Another day, another dollar I guess. Feel so tired. Eyelids heavy. Surveying people is tiresome. I guess we really just can't be bothered answering phone calls haha. But like personal best of 6. Shush! I know it was the first day so I couldn't not get a personal best. Don't burst a dreamer's bubble. That's just wrong. So many people. I haven't been amongst this many for a while. Need parking. Little Sleepless got his Provisionals, baby! Imma need your undivided. Y'all act like y'all can't hear. I got them time to cruise brother. iPod connectivity for the motherishing win. Now the whole hood can listen to good music. Aren't I just a public service? How damn cute am I? Yeah. Dat right. Ugly but interesting. Where do we go from here? In all honesty it is a hard thing to decide. What to do. Where to go. What about me. I'm the most important. Clearly. Following this train of thought? Cos I ain't. I just know its all true. Especially the me being the most important. I mean, clearly. Get with the program. "You don't blog anymore. That's probably my bad right? Bad, bad influence." Yeah. I guess you could be a bad influence. But in whole other ways. Think about that one, sweetie. And for all y'all out there, don't hurt yourselves trying. Just eat a meatball sandwich if you need to man up. But avoid the sauce. Always avoid the meatball sauce. Don't want that on your face do you Mr. Jyamaigo? You'd know all about that saucy sauciness, aye buddy? I jest. Calm down. Don't hurt me brother man. You know where I work. =P Falling asleep for the first time in a long time, The Sleepless Dreamer

Not Knowing.

Sometimes I think that not knowing is the easiest way to go about things. Coz if you don't know, then it's usually not you're problem, and if you don't get involved, then nothing much should affect you. Unless of course you decide to have made everything around you involve you.
But then again, most things around us DO involve us. So how do we deal with it?
We find out what it's about, and if we can't find out just by asking, then we try and work it out. Whichever you do first, both of these steps are done.
Next step is to see what YOU are capable of doing to mend or aid the situation. Most times, with the coordination of the group involved, and the contribution/sacrifice of each one of them, the problem is (hopefully) solved. If not, then we hope it is suppressed and taken to a level where the affect on all parties is minimal.
Then all is well, or in the worst case scenario, everyone wears a mask and the situation looks fine from every aspect as long as you're looking at the surface.

THE problem is...when the majority of people or the 'certain' people don't know what's going on at all. By that I don't mean they don't know about the problem. I simply mean they acknowledge and accept there's a problem but are given no information or connection to the situation.
Here's where the problem is. Being so sure there IS a problem, with all signs pointing that way, and yet having nothing like evidence or facts of sort to prove it. Then it gets to the stage where you think and ask yourself whether there was a problem to start with at all.
Shake that thought. You can TELL if there's a problem. I think we can all agree on that.

It was plain silly when you thought silence was the best thing in the world.
But you KNOW something's WRONG when it's become you're best friend.
It's almost like a shadow that just sticks. Think turning the lights off works?
Try it. You'll just get swallowed by it. Then it's ALL you have LEFT.


In need of a drink.
Drink with me,
Mr. Jyamaigo

Bottled Up.

I wonder how I feel.

Mr. Jyamaigo

Accidentally

Red Rock Deli Chips. Honey Soy Chicken.
It's so nice, I can almost taste it. But I can't eat it. SiiGH.
Quiet days, humid and windless weather. Headache prone.
And that ain't just me, errybody's moar prone to headache in this sorta weather.
Getting back into routines a lil hard, even if its just a slight routine of lifestyle.
Modern Family back on, Naruto off fillers, HIMYM is back too.
L4D2 is fun. I'm bored. LOL.

So what to do? I DONT KNOW LOL, YOU TELL MEEE
ARRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH

I'm going to drink water now.
I be back later.
With a moar decent. post.


Take it easy,
Mr. Jyamaigo

oh.

Back into it.

Well. The New Year's started, hope y'all had a good one. I had a good one, one that was very good and nearly exactly how i wanted it, but not to worry aye? Theres always next year (maybe not for those of you who believe in the 2012 destruction of the planet o.o) right?

So the year's started and it feels just like another day, yet, it's always a bit different. Re-evaluating what we did and what we didn't do, gives a lot to think about. And sets everyone up for what they SAY they'll do in this new year, and what they'll ACTUALLY do in the new year. I've hit a fair few goals in 2011, and in 2012, i aim to continue to knock down obstacles and really build up what i've got.

After hitting and completing a few goals tho, it's been like a realisation of what you are. What you do, is what you are. It's not what you've done in the past, it's not HOW you were in the past. It's about now. And the hardest thing about that is that so much of it is how people see you, it's rare to find someone who won't ask and then judge your past. But that's cool sometimes. Sometimes it's a surprise when you're a completely different person.

I'm tired. Sleepless nights have rolled over and caused quite a deficit in my energy throughout the day, it's been like dragging a car along with me wherever i walk, squatting the whole world on my shoulders everytime i stand. And what's worse, sleep can't be made up for. Trialled and proven. Your body 'feels' like you made up for sleep, but it actually calibrates itself to a lower standard overall, so you only 'feel' like you're back to normal. Smart body, good feeling, but negative effect. It's alrite to be a night owl, but remember, try not to NOT sleep. LOL

Bringin' it back, things lined up, gotta get driver's real soon, my driving's confident, my parkings improved considerably, now all i need to do is get someone to give me the thumbs up on my skills so i can dive head first into the test and OWN it!

Tired, wait, I've said that before but yeah. I'm tired and suffering DOMS. it's been far too long since i've trained. But what can you do with Christmas and NY so close together aye? hahahaha, i'll tell you what you CAN do, you can enjoy it! But now the parties over. Time to get back to work! May this year be better than the last but not better than the next! Cheers!


Take it easy,
Mr. Jyamaigo

P.S. I have this feeling. Just a feeling.